Todays dose of I'm a minority, don't speak to me or I'll get offended and cry racism, comes from Luton.
One Sahdia Yousefi, 35, asked staff at a Luton gym if she could leave her bag at reception while she looked around.
"Yes, as long as it doesn’t blow up" a member of staff allegedly said.
"I was so shocked I felt like someone had kicked me in the mouth" pouts Yousefi with foaming indignation at the insult.
"I need to safeguard my child and myself from derogatory remarks and that is where this company failed. If I had wanted to be labelled a terrorist in a public place I would go to a BNP march where I am sure they would be happy to oblige."
"I just want to leave, I can’t trust them now. The club manager told me the issue had been resolved but I want a written apology. This man didn’t even know me, he didn’t know if I spoke English, he just judged me by the colour of my skin."
(Surely he knew she spoke English if she'd just asked him to leave her bag with him in English - d'oh, dumb Sahdia, should have thought your story through better)
Funnily enough - being on holiday as I am - on the way a member of railway staff looked after my luggage in a waiting room for 5 minutes whilst I went for a pee. He asked if the suitcase was going to explode on him.
Perhaps I should sue him and cry racism? He obviously decided that because I was white I am a far right terrorist, hellbent on bringing death and destruction to the 9:22 all but empty service to Torquay.
Or, being a normal human being, I could - as I did - joke with him that he's safe while it's still ticking. All in good nature, no harm or offence taken either way. Besides, no way was it exploding, it had cider in it - some things are sacred, cider is not to be destroyed in explosions.
Not if you're a minority though, oh no. Any kind of normal conversation or humour is verboten lest they take offence and cry racism. Just speaking to them is dangerous, the race card is kept ready to be played at every opportunity.
Make a joke they don't like? You're in big trouble. You probably can't even bow and ask what you want master, your wish is my command oh great one - that would smack of slavery or colonialism no doubt.
Safest just not to speak to them, any word you dare utter could spell disaster. Nod, shake head, grunt, play the village idiot. Minority makes it a crime to speak whenever the whim takes them.
What a wonderful way to live, ain't diversity brilliant.